Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Extra terrestrials need rehab

    Several years ago, I filled a gap in my life. First, I need to confess something. I never saw X-files when it was on the air. It was a shame that haunted me for a long time, but eventually a close friend had an intervention for me, and over a couple of months I watched the first few seasons.

    While watching these I was inspired to 'research' UFO and alien lore. I already was rather well studied on quite a few other mythological systems, but this one does have quite a few unique traits. As I studied these supposed machinations and elaborate cover ups, definite patterns began to emerge.

    I read these theories of technologically advanced, super intelligent, incomprehensible visitors from beyond the stars. Then I had a revelation. If these stories were true, if what I was watching and reading had happened as portrayed, then it fit a pattern I knew well perfectly. This was the pattern of behavior of highly intelligent beings with access to technology. However; it is the behavior of such beings when they are either very very drunk or high.

    I was in a nerd fraternity. I have seen the actions of drunken geniuses. Given access to the right technology they would do such things in a heartbeat.

    "Hey, see that guy on a tractor down there? Let's beam him up and mess with him."

    "Oh man, I wonder what happens if we put the probe there?"

    "Know what? Let's pick that other guy up, take him away for five years, and bring him back just two days from now!"

    "Cows would totally look awesome inside out."

    "Pancakes are amazing! I know, we should go land next to that house and give that guy a plate of pancakes."

    "Oh man, that desert I just crashed into just popped out of nowhere!"

    It actually makes sense if you think about it. The hyper intelligent tend to have psych issues quite intensely. Medication can help, but self medication tends to be much more 'entertaining' for most. If you had an entire species of super-intelligent, ultra-depressed people who had reached a pinnacle of civilization eons ago; it would only make sense that most of them would eventually fall into chemical dependent decadence.

    There would be a few who stayed sober enough often enough to keep their technology driven society running, but being the one sober guy at the party gets old eventually. Being one of the few sober ones in an entire civilization would be hard. Over time, fewer and fewer would volunteer for the positions.
If there were quite a few other intelligent species in the universe, it would make some degree of sense that the most intelligent and powerful species would watch and keep track of them. They would at least watch to identify potential threats or species who might be particularly useful.

    Now, what if this advanced species were to decide they could no longer fulfill their role as 'Big Brother' to the universe? If they barely had enough sober members to watch over their own population of drunkards and druggies, they might look for another species to pass the torch to.

    Many species would be considered. They wouldn't want the smartest, they themselves were examples of how that wasn't necessarily sustainable. They wouldn't want the most pacifistic, the new species would have to keep the peace. They wouldn't want the most violent, they couldn't hand the universe over to someone who would just destroy it. They couldn't just leave it alone either, who knows what would happen then?

    Now, consider if they found out some of the rowdy members of their species had discovered an interesting species. The new species had been in one state of war or another since the beginning of their recorded history, but in the last century had developed a technology for war that could have wiped out their entire planet. Then the shocking information would come that instead of destroying themselves they had changed their methods of war to make the new weapons unused. This would be intriguing.

    Now; imagine if random drunken experiments found that the new species (let's call them humans) was genetically compatible with the old species (let's call them the dananites). In fact, further demented experiments could find that the humans had a rather broad range of interstellar species they could produce viable offspring with. A species capable of taking on traits of so many others would be a strong candidate for a successor, especially since the dananites could possibly integrate themselves into the society.

    Really, not much of a deal would have to be made to transfer responsibility. The dananites could offer the humans access to their technology and vast knowledge. The dananites could then make some of their population reproductively available to some humans. Some of the humans would agree. The humans would have the option to go out and take control of the stars, and while some might not be so inclined, others would jump at the chance.

    Different human societies would form in different areas, and they would most likely fight occasionally, but space is big. It would not be common to run out of room. Other species could cause problems, but many would be integrated into the mass of humanity.

    Humankind would grow strong and flourish, but not without hiccoughs.

    This is the thought process behind the concept of the greater universe within which my book I'm tentatively calling Age of Aphrodite is written.  The ideas will evolve further, but I believe the setting can hold much.

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